S.O.S.

I need advice. I need guidance. I need suggestions.

I need help...PLEASE.

The baby is still not sleeping. And when I say "not sleeping" I don't mean like solidly through the night. No, no, no...when I say "not sleeping," I mean that he still wakes up every 90 minutes or so...sometimes more...and sometimes much more. I get up somewhere between 7 and 10 times every single night. EVERY....SINGLE....NIGHT.

This is not normal. I know that babies wake up during the night...I'm not some delusional parent looking for eight solid hours of blissful sleep. I'm not greedy or unrealistic (hey, shut up). At this point, I would settle for three. Three hours, in a row, of uninterrupted sleep...something I haven't had since I was about five months pregnant (to put that in perspective, it was May 2008). I mean, he's five months old...according to all the books and pretty much everyone I know, he should be sleeping a heck of a lot more.

I cannot overstate how tired I am. Without trying to be overly dramatic or full of angst, my whole self is crying out for sleep. My head constantly aches, my eyes burn, my body hurts. I cannot think, focus, or pay attention. I alternate between being short-tempered, anxiety ridden, and numb. I dread the evenings, and always feel about one sleepless night away from a complete breakdown.

So I need all of you to help me...especially you parents. Please...if you have any ideas for what I can do to get him to stop waking up every hour...I'm all ears. Nothing you say will upset or offend me. I am sincerely asking for your advice...teach me!

So bring it on, people. Let the learnin' begin...